Skyping With Strangers OS
by LazyMasochistBoot
Summary: What happens when Bella accidentally starts up a Skype session with a complete stranger? Hilarity and silliness of course. Oh and duh...there'll be sex. Drunken fun. Lemons. The ONE-SHOT version.  Now a full length story...


**A/N: So, this is my sixth fic... I just got this idea that was inspired by the fics "Words With Friends" and "Merry Textmas". I think the problem with me is that I get bored too easily. There is just way too much going on in my brain at one time. But this is the fuckery it brings…so please enjoy my new creation…Skyping with Strangers…..**

**CONTINUATION HAS BEEN POSTED! GO CHECK IT OUT! -LazyMasochist P.S, I separated the one-shot from the story so if you had the one-shot in your faves or alerts, you could just add it again if you want...sorry for the mix-up! **

****SWS****

I hurriedly logged into my Skype account, my clumsy fingers fumbling with the letters on the keyboard. What the hell? Why are these keys so small? Is that an A or a P? I typed in Emmett's username and clicked the 'call' button. The image of a bedroom popped up immediately. But no Emmett. What the fuck? He needs to clean his sheets, those are just filthy. Hypocrite. I turned on my speakers and leaned close to the microphone before shouting, "Emmett fucking McCarthy, get your fucking ass to the computer now, you turd!" I specifically told him to be here at ten thirty. It is now ten thirty-five and the fucker still isn't here. I rolled my eyes and cursed at the screen before picking up my Heineken and taking another swallow. _Yum, yum, yum._ I waited and fucking waited….for like five minutes and still there was no fucking Emmett. _Motherfucker._

"Emmett, get your ass to the camera or I swear tomorrow, I'm gonna knee you in the balls so hard, you're gonna see fucking Tweety," I screeched to the camera. Ha, Tweety! Bella, you are one funny bitch. I heard heavy footsteps coming towards the camera. Yea, he better be fucking coming. "Next time, don't make me wait so long, you dunce! I-" I stopped mid-fucking-sentence as someone finally appeared in front of the camera. It sure as hell wasn't Emmett.

"Uh…hello? Yea, _who are you_?" they asked and I wasn't ashamed to admit that my jaw was fucking on the floor as I took in this guy. My panties dropped as well. Metaphorically, of course. Green eyes, fucked up sex hair and a fucking jaw that, alone, made my panties wet. He's fucking gorgeous. "Hello?" he tried again, pulling my attention away from his fuckableness. What was he saying?

My name…what was my name? Alcohol plus this guy is not good for my brain waves. "I…Emmett. I'm looking for Emmett…" _I Emmett? I'm looking for Emmett?_ Oh, I'm so smooth…

He raised a brow and looked around himself as if searching for Emmett. Sarcastic fucker, eh? "Well, sorry to disappoint but there's no Emmett here. I guess you got the wrong Skype." Fucking Skype effing things up.

"I…yea." But this was Emmett's URL though. "Hey, but this is my friends URL though so how…" What if he's kidnapped Emmett? Dun. Dun. DUNNNN.

Hot guy looked confused for a second, scratching his head. "I don't know. This is EDCullen's Skype. Who were you looking for?" He was trying to help me. That clearly means he wants to have my babies. Or however that works…..

"Uh…EDCarthy, I wasn't too far off, I guess it was just Skype acting up," I offered. He shrugged and nodded.

"Guess so. So, uh…goodbye then," he said awkwardly, running a hand though that fuck me hair.

"Wait!" I shouted. What was I gonna say? Why'd I say that? What to say now…

"Yes?" he raised a thick brow at me.

"Um…what's your name?" I asked lamely.

His eyes narrowed minutely and I shrugged, letting him know I had no clue where this was going either. "Edward…Cullen, as you can probably tell from the username."

"Right. Yea," I replied watching him nod.

"And you're 'EZCowBell'?" he read my username with a laugh.

I breathed a chuckle back at him. "Uh…no. It's Bella. Swan."

"Bella Swan? A bit unusual, I have to say."

"Yah. Not to mention misleading. Nothing swanlike here—'cept for my tat, I guess."

"Your tat?" he repeated, sounded interested. He sat up a bit straighter in his chair. "You have a tattoo?"

"Uh huh," I agreed. "Of a swan. Do you…do you want to see?"

"If you don't mind, yes."

"Not at all." I leaned forward and pulled the collar of my shirt down to show him the swan tattoo just above my left tit. "See?"

"Oh, yea that's pretty fuckin' awesome."

"Right?" It _was_ pretty awesome. The swan was swimming over the edge of a waterfall and it just looked cool. "So, you got any tats?"

"Well…" he trailed off, glancing away.

"Well…let me see. It's only fair," I bribed.

He sighed. "Okay, fine, but keep in mind that I got this when I was extremely drunk." He stood up and started unbuckle his pants. I leaned into the camera instinctually. Where was this tattoo?

He kicked his pants off and pulled down the side of his boxers, allowing me a small glimpse at his ass. Mmmmmm. "See?" he asked, pointing to the side of his thigh. The word "Hooters" was there, surrounded by a mass of roses.

"Umm…wow," I laughed. "Flowery Hooters?"

"I'm not proud of it," he said with a crooked grin as he sat back down.

"Yea, you shouldn't be," I retorted jokingly.

"Yea, yea," he grinned.

"So, uh…if I may ask, what's a guy like you doing home on a Saturday night? Should you be out with your buds?"

"A guy like me?" he raised his brow with a smirk.

"Uh…you know…attractive. You're attractive." Fuck the blush that came across my cheeks.

"Well, thank you," he accepted cockily, "you're attractive too." And cue the second blush. "But no," he continued, shaking his head. "I'm not much of a partier. What's your excuse?"

"Me? Oh, I'm a total loser," I laughed, "I enjoy drinking alone and then drunk Skyping friends. Or strangers, apparently."

"I see…mind if I join the party?"

"Join me?" As in…

"I have a six pack of beer in my fridge, what do you say we drunk Skype each other?" he smirked.

"You'd drunk Skype with a complete stranger?"

"I'm Skyping with a stranger already…"

"Hmm touché…Edward, I think you've got yourself a deal," I smiled.

"Alright!" he stood to go get his beer.

"But," I started.

"But what?" he questioned. Curiously.

"We gotta play strip paper toss," I smirked.

**SWS**

Edward tossed the paper and it glided the rim of the trash can before landing on the floor. "You missed!" I shouted. "You missed, start drinking! I win!"

He growled turning to me and picked up his fifth bottle and chugged it down while I chanted his name. We were both ridiculously drunk. "Woo! Good for you, hombre!" I cheered. "Now strip!"

He was out of socks, watches and his shirt—and my, my, my, did he have a nice chest. That thing was like heaven. I wanted to lick every single one of the abs and muscles he had, and the little tuft of hair was simply UNF—so the only thing left was his boxers. "Ooh boxers are coming off," I slurred excitedly.

"Fiiiiine," he fumbled around beneath the desk he was sitting at and soon he held up his boxers, waving them at the camera. "They're off, are you happy?"

"Very!" I licked my lips. "Especially since I won!" I did a tiny happy dance in my chair.

"Does this mean I don't get to see tits tonight?" he said, his words slightly slurred like mine.

I threw my head back in laughter. He'd only managed to get me in my bra and panties—apparently he sucked at paper tossing. "You want me to finish the game?" He nodded eagerly.

"Fine, then." I spun in my chair to face the trash can and balled up another piece of computer paper, tossing it. It bounced off the side. "Damn it!"

"Yess! Show me the tits!"

"Blah blah," I reached back to unhook my bra and tossed it behind me. "Tits!" I shook them at him, smirking as his eyes bulged and he leaned into the camera.

"Fuck."

I must admit, I have pretty nice boobs. Not porn star big but not itty bitty. I call em Poobs—y'know…..perfect boobs…poobs?

"Nice, right?" I asked, staring down at them. I poked the right one. "This one's my favorite."

"Mmm," he responded, entranced.

Curious at his silence, I looked back to him, only to see his right arm moving frantically beneath the desk. "Holy fuck, are you…" Was he jerking off? Right now? Seriously. His groan let me know he was. I felt myself getting wet at the thought that I'd made him hard…. "Scoot back, let me see," I instructed, biting my lip. He obeyed and wheeled backwards so that he was far enough away for me to see his entire body.

The cock he held in his hand was beyond big. So thick his large hand hardly fit around it and so long that a substantial amount towered over his hand. "Fuck," I moaned.

"Mmm, you like?" he asked, his hand slowing a bit.

"Yesss, I like," I licked my lips, mesmerized by the way his hand moved.

"Take your panties off," he said in a slightly breathless voice. I didn't need to be told twice. I stood and slipped them off, moving back from the camera so he could see all of me too. I put a leg up on the desk, spreading myself for him shamelessly.

"Fuck yess," he hissed, regaining a steady rhythm with his hand again as he stared at my bare pussy. I moaned at the sight. "Fuck your pussy for me," he instructed and that was all the invitation I needed to slide a single finger into my already wet pussy. My other hand fell to my tit, pinching and pulling my nipple. "Mmm yes, so fucking sexy. More. I think my dick is worth a bit more than one finger," he hinted, watching me with rapt attention as I pushed another two fingers into myself. I'd only ever done up to two so my pussy stretched as I plunged my three fingers in and out of it with concentrated speed and strength. It felt fucking amazing.

"Ungh! Fuck, like this, Edward?" I questioned watching him as I fucked myself. His hand moved impossibly faster and he grunted with each pump.

"Yess, is your pussy wet for me? Did my cock make you wet?" Fuuck.

"Fuck yes, you did." I gripped my tit as my fingers sped up on their own accord. His words were killing me, slowly forcing me towards the brink.

"Are you pretending that's my cock fucking you? Can you feel me thrusting in and out of your pussy? How hard I am for you?"

I moaned his name, my eyes falling closed as he spoke. I could hear the faint slapping sound as his hand moved rapidly on his cock. "Cause I feel you and you feel so fucking good. Your pussy is so tight. Fuck, I can feel it squeezing me…" he broke off with a grunt. "Fuck! I can imagine you riding me, your tits bouncing, begging for me to touch them-"

"Fuck, you're so sexy," I exclaimed. "Mmm I can feel your cock pounding into me and you gripping my ass—ungh!" I was so fucking close. His groans and grunts were making me drip. "I need to come," I whimpered.

"Are you going to come for me, Bella? Fucking come for me."

"Yessss," I hissed, too far gone to be embarrassed by the loud and needy sound. My fingers were frantic and wild…my other hand soon found my clit and rubbed furiously. The sounds I was making, I couldn't even describe. "Edward," I called out, my hip gyrating, grinding into my fingers as I moved closer and closer to the edge.

"Fuck, baby I'm so close! Ungh, I can't wait to come in that tight fucking pussy!" And I was done.

"I…fuck!" I yelled as a shiver rippled through my body. My head fell back and my mouth opened in a wordless scream as I came hard.

"Fuck yes, Bella," I heard his breathless voice say and I opened my eyes in time to see him come, long spurts landing on his chest—and for some reason that was fucking sexy.

"Mmm, that was fucking amazing," I commented panting as he grabbed his shirt from the floor to clean himself up.

"I can't believe I did that," he added, leaning back in his chair with a satisfied grin. "Can we do it again sometime," he said after a beat with a sloppy grin.

I bit my lip and pretended to be deep in thought. "We shall see," I reached for the mouse. "Same time tomorrow. Goodbye, Edward," I grinned and waved at his smiling face before exiting out of the program.

Phew! I'll probably regret this in the morning but whatever, that was the best Skype of my life.

Who says website glitches aren't good?


End file.
